The child develops the expectation that “people will take care of me” and “good things happen to me”.Ĥ. This makes the world feel safe, warm, predictable and secure. Reassuring, such as rocking, feeding, cuddling and holding. Nurture: These activities are soothing, calming, quieting and The parent focuses on the child in an exclusive way providing sensitively timed soothing and delightful interactions.ģ. Engagement: The parent is attuned to the child’s state and responds in a way that helps the child to regulate and integrate physical and emotional states. These activities have a predictable sequence and rhythm.Ģ. Structure: Which helps the child become physically regulated. Interactions focus on four essential qualities found in parent-child relationships:ġ. One of the key aims is for the child to view themselves as worthy and lovable, and to experience positive and rewarding relationships and interactions. In healthy relationships, there should be natural patterns of playful, healthy interaction between parent and child. The aim of these activities (based loosely on Theraplay techniques) is to build attachment, self-esteem, trust in others, and joyful engagement. Our letterbox coordinators can offer advice and ideas to help you write your letter. Your agreement may include:Įxactly what can be sent, when and how often will be agreed before letterbox begins.Īdoption West will photocopy all letters and cards so there is a complete record on the child’s letterbox file in case anything is lost in the future. Only items which can be easily posted can be exchanged through the letterbox service. The child(ren) can contribute, for example by including a drawing, handprint or by writing something when they are older, but only if they want to. Letterbox contact is made between the adults on behalf of the child(ren). If a letter from the birth family doesn’t arrive in the due month, we will send a reminder letter. Reminder letters will be sent out a few weeks before news is due to be exchanged. Once an agreement is in place, a confirmation letter is sent to both families. The best interest of the child will always come first when the nature of the contact is being decided. These arrangements set out exactly what will be exchanged and when the exchanges will take place. Letterbox arrangements are usually drawn up before the child goes to live with their adoptive family. Receiving these letters lets birth families know about their child’s progress and development and offers reassurance about the child’s wellbeing. It is important that adopted children can continue to keep a relationship with their siblings where appropriate, in many cases this is through Letterbox contact. Losing contact with their siblings, can cause children distress. Many of our adopted children have sisters and brothers living with a different adoptive or foster family. They often find that the exchanges of information with birth relatives helps them to talk more openly with their children about their adoption. It can help children to develop a sense of their identity, reassure them about the wellbeing of their birth family and let them know that they have not been forgotten.Īdoptive families benefit from knowing more about their child’s birth family origins, family traits, health issues and medical history. Research has shown that most adopted children benefit from having information about their birth family as they grow up.
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